glueing the plates isn't necessary ; it will make it harder to sand/replace them later... a little bit of diff grease does the job (adhesion grease, often translucent, do not use black grease like for trust bearings)
it is normal to see a groove in the diffplates, but it has to be narrow, shallow and clean. Like you said yours has slipped and made a mess.
the whole point of rebuilding a diff (sanding the plates and then breaking in your diff ) is allowing the balls to form a nice new narrow "path" to roll in ...
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