I don't think length is mentioned in the instructions, but they do say that the terminals stamped 'A' are for the male connector and those stamped 'B' are for the female connector. Having just looked at some the 'A' terminals are slightly longer.
Looking at your photo it looks like they are 4 short 'B' terminals. You can just about see 'B' on the bottom left one, I assume that on the other 3 it is on the other side unless they've been manufactured wrong.
I don't know why you couldn't get the short ones into either the male or female, but they should have clicked into the female connector. Another thing is to make sure you soldered to the right side of the terminal, solder on top of the 'WIRE SIDE' stamp. If you soldered to the right side of all 4 terminals, the slightly longer 'A' terminals should click into the male side and the slightly shorter 'B' terminals click into the female connector.
You can get away with pulling them back out of the connector, if you wanted to try the B's in the female again. They take a fairly firm shove to get them to click. If that doesn't work perhaps there's something wrong with yours.
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