Ian in all seriousness if you want to get it remapped, talk to DMS tuning (Not far from you)
http://www.dmsautomotive.com/
They remapped my bosses RS6 and it's now around 700bhp, the thing is an absolute rocket but they really know what they're doing and actually custom map each car.
They can also set it up and let you try it for a few days before deciding if you want to go ahead with it.